Saturday, November 27, 2010

Vicki, Selfish?

.On the outside, some people may say she is selfish. Actually I don't think Selfish is the best word to describe her character. She's more 'materialistic'. From growing up, her aim was to climb on top of everyone- to marry a rich man and be set for life. ........ If it wasn't for her brother not believing her earlier, Vicki wouldn't have turned herself into alcoholic and involved herself in the accident- later ending her life. fungyifanatic, May 4 2008 asianfanatics
With all due respect, I think selfish is the exact word to use on Vicky, as well as these: vain, shallow, spoiled, self-centered, self-absorbed, and of course, materialistic. Her suicide is the ultimate selfish act that a person can do to her loved ones. Yes, she loves her family and Raymond, too, but all at her convenience and her love is very conditional. As much as she loves them, she can just as selfishly cut them off, quite hardheartedly I might add, like she did to her mother in the office, to Ah On, to Raymond and off course, to her unborn baby, when they interfered with her dreams of social advancement.

                                                     Vicki's death on the beach

As for attending Ah On’s birthday party, she did because she misses them, she misses their love, their warmth, their acceptance and their adoration of her, which is totally lacking for her right then. She needs to recharge her dry spell of love. So, conveniently she thought of those who love her, therefore, she’s willing to chance her lover’s displeasure because at that time she thought she had him in her hand, which of course, turns out to be wrong. But she's willing to trade familial & romantic love for love of materialism, and her goal of a marriage of convenience.

I totally relate to Vicky's and Raymond’s wanting to advance their social and wealth status, doesn’t mean I condone their methods. And I’m a pro choice advocate…but the way Vicky blatantly tricked On and Raymond off her back in order to abort her baby, that act totally smacked of deviousness, callousness & selfishness all rolled into self-agenda. Her abortion is like a cruel slap on Ah On‘s face considering his and Gaga’s baby circumstance. No wonder Ah On went ballistic on her.

If it wasn't for her brother not believing her earlier, Vicki wouldn't have turned herself into alcoholic and involved herself in the accident- later ending her life

Totally disagree with your statement. One has to take responsibility for one’s own actions and not blame someone’s else for one’s life mishaps. And nobody, but nobody can drive anybody to drink or to other self-destructive acts, none! Vicky has only herself to blame for her situation. When she’s out of favor with lover boss, she falls apart and wallows in self-pity; poor me, my lover loves me not, my brother disowns me, my family ignores me, poor me, poor me. Why me? Why me? I only drink to drown my sorrows, poor me!. Totally self-centered, she does not see beyond her own ‘pitiful’ situation. She has many chances to make up with Ah On, like bridging through her mom who never abandons her, or her younger sister who still idolizes her, or Raymond who still loves her. Like Ah On says, he’s only one member in the family. She could have sought forgiveness from her mother and brother, groveled if must, but her pride prevented that. As usual, it’s all about her and her pride, her guilt, her grief, her feelings, her emotions...everything centers on her. Is she truly sorry for the hurt she has caused her family, or is that she's just feeling sorry for her present situation?

And when she caused the tragic accident, again she did not see beyond her own feelings and pain…what about Ah On’s? What about Gaga’s? What about her mother’s? Yes, her brother can’t stand the sight of her; but her mother could use her help getting through her grief, but Vicky is too self-absorbed in her guilt to reach out and make amends, so much so, she becomes depressed and ultimately commits suicide. Her family did not abandon her in her hour of needs, all she had needed to do was call for help, but pride stood in the way. A phone call to her mom would have her rushing to her side. So now her brother is to be blamed for her death and her alcholism? Don’t think so.

If only at that moment, Ah On did not reject Vicky..then.. maybe the accident could be averted...maybe.

Other perspectives on the incident:
If only Vicky wasn't drunk....
If only at that moment, Vicky had listened to Ah On and did not drive...
If only they didn't meet each other at that point in time....
If only Gaga wasn't there.....

But fate steps in...blame it on fate.. maybe the incident could be prevented, but ultimately, there's no shifting of blame for one's own action(s), especially not the taking of one's life.

1 comment:

  1. My personal opinion: the fact that Vicky commits suicide is already proof that she is selfish, as she is relieving herself of all her pain and suffering with total disregard for what her family is going through (as well as the added pain to her family to have to mourn for her). For the above reasons, I've always looked at suicide as a cowardly act and can't respect anyone who would end their lives in that manner.

    I'm also a huge advocate of people taking responsibility for their actions and there is no such thing as "entitlement" in my book. So pretty much, Vicky has no one to blame but herself for the path that she took and the way she ended up....